NICHOLAS MILLAR FINALLY SLOWS
DOWN
NORFOLK manager Nicholas Millar has ditched his punishing regime of
endless cocaine binges for the more sedate lifestyle of month-long
drinking sessions with Russian barmaids.
Friends of Millar are
relieved that, at the age of 28, he is finally slowing down and devoting
more of his time to vodka and teenage girls.
One source close to
the manager said: "Nick was a workaholic. He would spend up to three weeks
without sleep, constantly looking for new holes to put cocaine
into.
"His only respite would be the hourly break to drink absinthe
and have dangerously acrobatic sex with nine of the women queuing outside
the hotel."
The source added: "There's only so long you can keep
that up before your body says, 'enough is enough - drink nothing but vodka
and stick to one teenager at a time'."
Another close friend said:
"For Nick this is a bit like taking up gardening or golf.
"He's
getting to bed at 4am and sleeping for at least five hours a night. He's
introduced solids into his diet and is only smoking things that started
off as plants.
"But what's really important is that for the first
time in his life, he's really enjoying his vodka and 19
year-olds."
by Nicholas
Millar
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